Three weeks of football, and things are beginning to make sense.

Just kidding.

Furman went to Macon and ended Mercer’s 12-game SoCon winning streak. The Citadel lost to Wofford by 28, beat an FBS team, then immediately lost to an FCS team. Western Carolina has spent the last two weeks conducting experiments with rushing statistics. Chattanooga lost again. Samford is 0-3. VMI scored three points and somehow made me love them more.

And Tennessee Tech remains undefeated against a schedule assembled with tremendous care.

Let’s rank some football teams.

1. ETSU (1-2)

Lost to North Carolina, 35-3

Didn’t really care about this game going in. Don’t really care about it now.

ETSU went to Chapel Hill, played an ACC team with considerably more dudes, lost 35-3 and came home. That’s generally how these things work.

I was actually impressed at times. ETSU possessed the ball for nearly 34 minutes and went 8-of-16 on third down. Mason Mims completed 23-of-32 passes, and the Bucs put together some legitimate drives. There were moments where they looked perfectly comfortable playing up a level.

There were also moments where North Carolina looked like North Carolina.

Fine.

My favorite development was Will Healy becoming absolutely furious with the officials in the second quarter and basically requiring a get-back guy on the sideline.

Fire. Love it.

I don’t need my coach calmly accepting a flag while we’re playing an ACC team on the road. I want someone assigned specifically to prevent him from accidentally entering the secondary.

Anyway, ETSU got paid. I don’t recall any injuries. I was impressed with some things.

West Georgia next. Now the games matter again.

ETSU remains No. 1. Read the bylaws.

2. Furman (2-1, 1-0 SoCon)

Beat Mercer, 20-13

Well hello there.

Last week Furman went to Knoxville and lost 56-9. I basically gave them an excused absence.

Apparently they used the time to study.

Furman went into Macon and beat the two-time defending SoCon champions, ending Mercer’s 12-game conference winning streak. The Paladins forced five turnovers, including four interceptions.

Five turnovers.

At that point it’s less “forcing turnovers” and more Mercer repeatedly handing you its wallet.

The game was still tied 13-13 with less than two minutes remaining. Furman got the ball at its own 15, went 85 yards in six plays, and Ben Croasdale finished it with a 47-yard touchdown with 47 seconds left.

Nathan Chapman also made field goals from 44 and 43 yards.

Western Carolina fans, please stop reading.

This is exactly why I didn’t care about Furman getting smoked by Tennessee. The useful information was always going to come when they played somebody in their own weight class.

They did.

They went to Mercer’s house and won.

Furman is a good team.

3. Mercer (2-1, 0-1 SoCon)

Lost to Furman, 20-13

Last week Jaylen King accounted for six touchdowns. This week Mercer turned the ball over five times.

Football is very mean.

Mercer actually outgained Furman and still had the lead in the fourth quarter. But there are only so many times you can hand the other team the football before the sport begins punishing you for it.

Unfortunately, four of those turnovers were interceptions.

Which means we have to talk about Jaylen King again.

Former ETSU quarterback. North Dakota State. Johnson City. ETSU up 35-23 with less than two minutes left.

Lost 38-35.

I was there. Saddest I’ve ever been after a football game.

No joke. Hated that day.

Anyway, Mercer had won 12 straight SoCon games before Saturday, so I’m not suddenly deciding the Bears stink. They had a turnover apocalypse and Furman made them pay for it.

Still a really good football team.

Just no longer allowed to act like they own the conference.

4. Wofford (2-1, 1-0 SoCon)

Lost to Kent State, 36-15

I don’t hate this.

Wofford went on the road against an FBS team and made it uncomfortable for a while. Led going into the fourth quarter… Then Kent State remembered it had more scholarships.

That’s usually how this story ends.

The offense still worries me. Wofford finished with only 173 yards and went 0-for-12 on third down.

Zero for twelve.

There are certain statistics where you don’t really need advanced analytics. That’s one of them.

But after two weeks of watching Wofford win games in increasingly strange ways, seeing them compete up a level doesn’t really hurt my opinion of them.

The Terriers are 2-1. They’re undefeated in the SoCon. They own a 42-14 win over The Citadel.

The Citadel then beat an FBS team.

And then lost to Charleston Southern.

Actually, forget it.

I don’t know what any of this means.

Wofford stays fourth.

5. Western Carolina (1-2)

Lost to Cincinnati, 62-10

I’m willing to give Western Carolina the FBS-game hall pass here.

Cincinnati is Cincinnati. They had 690 total yards, rushed for 418 and scored seven touchdowns on the ground.

That’s not particularly useful information for figuring out whether Western Carolina can win the Southern Conference.

What is becoming mildly concerning is what’s happening at the line of scrimmage.

Last week against Campbell, Western Carolina’s offense rushed for one total yard.

This week against Cincinnati, Western Carolina’s defense allowed 418 rushing yards.

Those are two completely different statistics.

Unfortunately, neither is one you want.

That’s 419 yards of evidence from consecutive weeks suggesting we may want to spend some practice time discussing the trenches.

Still, I’m not overreacting to 62-10 at Cincinnati. Lex Thomas can play, Kerwin Bell can coach offense, and I still think Western is capable of being one of the more dangerous teams in the SoCon.

Honestly, the Campbell loss tells me considerably more than this one.

And Campbell has now beaten ETSU and Western Carolina, so I’m increasingly comfortable with my official position from last week:

Campbell is good.

Wake up.

Western gets Presbyterian next.

Perfect.

Play somebody your own size. Run the football. Make your kicks. Score a bunch of points.

Then we’ll talk.

6. The Citadel (1-2, 0-1 SoCon)

Lost to Charleston Southern, 26-20 (2OT)

I give up.

Week 1: lose to Wofford, 42-14.

Week 2: beat FBS Charlotte, 43-41 in triple overtime.

Week 3: lose to Charleston Southern, 26-20 in double overtime.

Who are you?

The Citadel outgained Charleston Southern 308-188. They ran for 235 yards. Their defense had six sacks.

Charleston Southern had 188 total yards.

And won.

Last week Charlotte had 538 yards against The Citadel.

And lost.

Do you understand the problem I’m having?

This is no longer a football program. It’s a randomized study.

The Bulldogs have played three games, two have gone to multiple overtimes, they’ve beaten an FBS team, lost to two FCS teams and somehow made me understand them less every Saturday.

Sixth.

Why?

No idea.

Ask The Citadel.

7. Chattanooga (1-2)

Lost to Eastern Kentucky, 22-17

I keep saying Chattanooga isn’t bad.

Eventually Chattanooga needs to help me.

The Mocs were right there again. They led in the fourth quarter and had a chance to win. The offense also looked more functional than it did against Tennessee Tech, when Chattanooga completed four passes and briefly attempted to repeal the forward pass.

Kevin Lalin ran for 98 yards and a touchdown.

Progress.

The problem is Chattanooga has basically no margin for error. They aren’t explosive enough offensively to casually survive mistakes.

And Eastern Kentucky got a 96-yard touchdown run.

Ninety-six.

At that point the running back has crossed multiple ZIP codes.

Rusty Wright said afterward that Chattanooga doesn’t have “a whole lot of room to make mistakes.”

That’s basically this team in one sentence.

They’re not terrible. They can run. The defense can play. They’re competitive.

They just need to stop making every fourth quarter feel like defusing a bomb.

Chattanooga gets Wofford next.

That feels appropriate.

8. Samford (0-3)

Lost to Tennessee Tech, 45-19

Not great.

Last week I was encouraged because Samford went from negative-eight rushing yards in Week 1 to 70.

Unfortunately for them, Samford is 0-3.

There are pieces here. John Grass inherited a team that went 1-11 last year, so I’m not expecting a three-week miracle.

But eventually the “we’re close” phase needs to produce a win.

Saturday wasn’t close. Tennessee Tech led 31-9 at halftime.

I don’t enjoy reporting that.

Samford has a bye.

Much needed.

9. VMI (0-3)

Lost to Bucknell, 14-3

I LOVE VMI.

I mean this sincerely.

They lost again. They scored three points.

Don’t care.

Seven days after losing 73-3 at Virginia Tech, VMI came home and held Bucknell scoreless for three quarters.

Three quarters!

VMI led 3-0 entering the fourth.

COME ON.

The Keydets eventually lost 14-3 because, yes, at some point you do need to score more than three points.

Details.

But this would’ve been an incredibly easy spot for a young team to show up completely defeated. Instead they fought.

Ashley Ingram said afterward, “I’m proud of our effort today.”

ME TOO, ASHLEY!

He also said he had no doubt his guys would continue to fight.

I believe him.

Ian Reynolds even threw for 155 yards, which frankly feels a little extravagant for VMI.

Careful.

We’re getting dangerously modern.

I remain completely invested in this project. Run the option. Shorten the game. Make everyone miserable. Win something 9-7.

I don’t care.

VMI gets Davidson next.

Davidson is bad.

Please.

Give me one.

10. UNCG (0-0)

Undefeated.

Three weeks without allowing a point.

Starting to feel sustainable.

11. Tennessee Tech (3-0)

Beat Samford, 45-19

Here we go.

Tennessee Tech is 3-0.

Congratulations.

Let’s examine the résumé before we start naming buildings.

Monmouth. Chattanooga. Samford.

Yes, the Monmouth win was good. I already acknowledged it. But is Monmouth actually good?

Anyways, that was an extremely vulnerable moment for me and I’d appreciate everyone respecting my privacy.

Then Tech beat Chattanooga.

Chattanooga completed four passes.

Now Tech beat Samford.

Samford is 0-3.

I’m supposed to do what with this?

Tech did exactly what it should’ve done Saturday: beat a struggling team badly.

Good.

That’s the assignment. You don’t get extra credit because you remembered to put your name on it.

And yes, I know Tech is undefeated. I know they’re ranked. I know they went 11-2 last year.

I have reviewed the propaganda.

I’m simply asking them to beat somebody before we begin discussing Cookeville as the new capital of college football.

The Monmouth win moved the needle.

The other two have not.

So after three victories, Tennessee Tech moves from No. 11…

to No. 11.

UNCG remains undefeated.

My hands are tied.

What Did We Learn?

ETSU played North Carolina. Didn’t matter. Saw some things I liked. Will Healy nearly needed a court-appointed get-back guy because he was so angry at the officials.

Loved that.

Furman is good. Mercer learned that five turnovers is generally considered excessive. Wofford might actually be annoying. Western Carolina needs a normal football game.

The Citadel beat an FBS team and then lost to an FCS team because this conference has rejected logic.

Chattanooga continues making me defend them without providing wins. Samford needs the bye week.

VMI is 0-3 and I have never been more invested.

Ashley Ingram, I am with you.

Run it again.

UNCG remains undefeated.

And Tennessee Tech is 3-0 against a schedule that I will continue examining under laboratory conditions.

We’ll reassess next week.

Except ETSU is No. 1.

UNCG is ahead of Tech.

Tech is last.

Those are constitutional.